From: TERRIE
I hated sadhana for the whole time I was in 3HO. I simply could not stand the people that early in the morning. The single men were into “Yoga Wars” and I could feel negativity beaming from this person or that. Half the time the sadhana leader couldn’t carry a tune so even Sa Ta Na Ma meditation was done off key and it drove me bananas. I was too tired with over-work and babies to be there in the first place and so forth.
As soon as I got out of 3HO Ashrams and into a nuclear family: “O boy, I’m awake and it is quiet, no kids, and I am by myself!”. I started loving sadhana. This kept me in 3HO longer as well, because in my second 3HO decade I was extremely independent and it finally felt like I was getting somewhere! As soon as I left the Ashram scene I started blossoming!
I thought that it was because 3Ho was finally working… actually it was because I was finally free of much of it! What a dupe.
From: LEIGH
The “leader” of our sadhana used to walk in, put on the music so loud that my little son would wake up and scream, then walk out to presumably go back to bed. No one was to dare touch the controls and make it lower or they would be reported. When I applied for permission to make it lower, I was told to get a device to measure the sound with. Of course I did, and it was in the dangerous zone. She turned it down just below that, and my son still screamed.
After that I started to stay home and do it in my living room. It was a lot more peaceful, although officially that was considered the same as not going.
From: SOPHIE
There was one guy in my ashram who had the same routine every morning. He would swagger into the Sadhana room after things had gotten started. Then, like a dog going around marking his territory, he would adjust every little part of the environment to his liking. He would raise or lower the lights, open or close some windows, turn the music up or turn it down, go in and fuss with stuff in the Gurdwara… Then he would make a big ruckus getting settled onto his sheepskin, adjusting his kurta around him, making his shawl just so, taking a big swig of water out of his thermos.
You can see from this that meditative concentration was not my strongest talent. I never had the temperament to tolerate other people’s personalities (let alone my own) at that hour of the morning. Too intense. Maybe that’s why a lot of spiritual teachers say that the Amrit Vela is the most powerful time to do inner work. Either that or it’s the most powerful time to go slowly insane.
From: ROB
I have to confess, I loved sadhana! While basically a night owl, I still sometimes enjoy getting up that early and having some spiritual practice and clearing my mind. I also much more enjoy sadhana on my own, as the group never really felt like more than 10% actually enjoyed. One of my favorite 3HO-isms was once YB gave a lecture about the importance of sadhana, and that just getting up and getting there was 70% of the battle. The people in the community then re-interpreted what he said to be that just getting up and getting there gives you 70% of the benefits, so they would show up, do some spinal flex, then crash out in their sleeping bags until it was over! A couple of years ago I went to Solstice for old times’ sake, and sure enough, people were still saying/doing this!
From: TERRIE
One generally wonderful 3HO fellow Mom had this one big pet-peeve. She was pissed off that most of us were sadhana slackers. She had been raised Catholic and she loved saying the morning Ardas. One morning she outdid herself: “Bless those sad (3HO) Sikhs who are still in bed sleeping away the ambrosial hours of this morning. They are like little insects, bugs on the screen of life, cursed and caught, failing to find any freedom….”
From: SOPHIE
A long time ago I knew a guy who had a lot of guilt about his terrible sadhana. He had become the ashram scapegoat because he liked to sleep late. Everyone was involved in trying to ‘save’ him.
One time he and I were walking in downtown Chicago in an Italian neighborhood. Two burly guys approached us respectfully, “Excuse me, we just want to know – what are youse anyway?” (That day we were in shining white.) My friend replied, “We are Sikhs.” “Sikhs?” said one guy, “What do Sikhs do?” My friend got an other-worldly look on his face and said dramatically, “We RISE…” (making an upward gesture) “in the Amrit Vela.” We left those two guys scratching their heads.
From: RAFAEL
One of the factors that I think really caused 3HO to develop, or rather malform, the way it did was the fact that the yoga DIDN’T WORK. And the sadhana didn’t work either. Theoretically the sadhana was going to charge you full of prana and energy like a powerful booster engine that was going to power you through the day. Only, it left people exhausted. This exhaustion, combined with the complete, amateurish lack of organization, is why the businesses failed, why people couldn’t earn a living. I used to work on construction crews where we’d make stupid mistakes, slack off, leave big messes behind etc., all because we were so damn tired.
I had an epiphany fairly early on, which unfortunately I ignored. I had driven overnight and arrived about 5 AM at the ashram and walked into sadhana. The room was packed, maybe 40, 50 people. And it struck me that no one, not one single person wanted to be there. Everyone was just miserable.
From: TERRIE
I think what you are saying is a really important point. It reminds me of this comedy routine that Japji Singh of the Bay Area used to do. He infused the word POWERFUL with mucho testosterone, playing the perfect yogic jock!
“This morning at 3:30am I woke up and I took a POWERFUL cold shower!”
“Then I came downstairs and I did a POWERFUL sadhana!”
“After my POWERFUL sadhana, I ate a POWERFUL breakfast!”
“And then I went back upstairs and I took a POWERFUL nap!”
From: GUEST
Sadhana: My husband used to go to graduate school and fall asleep in the classroom quite regularly.
From: TERRIE
I remember being taught that doing sadhana and White Tantric Courses were going to clear my psyche and process my past drama and trauma and “ping!” someday I would be FREE, liberated, in the cosmic KNOW, self-actualized, and fully my TRUE (SAT) Self (Nam!).
I still believe in karma in some sense and that I have some life lessons to learn and that meditating and therapy help me process my wounds from my past. I still believe all that, because that is what has worked for me.
But the kicker was that as I cleaned out and processed my old wounds while in 3HO, I kept discovering that 3HO was the problem – that it was part of my self-sabotaging weird dark side acting out. I discovered that what I thought was healing was actually actively out to harm me.
That was enlightening for sure. Of course, the big enlightened breakthrough was discovering how stupid human “gurus” are and the whole chela thing is pretty kinky too!
In 3HO, youngster that I was, I thought I was in a training to become an enlightened Master. Nobody told me that that was just a silly narcissistic side of me, trying to purify herself of shame.
From: GUEST
Or to put it differently, sometimes you just have to get on with it! Before you liberate yourself from life, you have to have a life first.
From: TERRIE
At some point Yogi Bhajan had cards made that said: “Just do sadhana!” When anyone approached him for advice, he would hand them one of these cards. Even at the time I thought this was lame.
Now I think 3HOers were saved from whatever other advice he would have given. The card was a great blessing.